So, with all of the time I spend watching paint dry, I have discovered that I have way too much time to just think.  My most recent thoughts revolve around a rather maddening subject.

LOVE

I mean really!!! Falling in love has to be one of the most tormenting things a person will ever experience by far.  When it comes right down to it love sucks for a multitude of reasons.  The one that annoys me the most (being a scientist and all) is that you really can't explain it.  From this observation a string of other problems arise.  Being that you can't explain it you therefore can't predict it.  When you fall in love it is just something that you suddenly realize.  I really don't want to hear about all of that cliché Cupid crap but the idea of getting shot by an arrow is kind of a good metaphor.

One minute you're living your life as you think you should be and then out of nowhere this notion of love changes the way you think.  Your brain short circuits or something and suddenly everything you see, every song you hear, the entire world that surrounds you is suddenly a reminder of the person you’ve fallen for.  You can’t get them out of your head no matter what.  The only way to stop thinking of them is to be with them.  Now admit it, you’ve been there before and it drives you nuts when all you can think about is them.  No work can be properly completed in a timely manner.  You become handicapped by thoughts of someone else.

       So once you've come to the conclusion that you are in love and you actually admit it to not only yourself (HUGE deal) but other people as well, (not necessarily the one you're in love with if you do that you're skipping a step) and then all of the doubts start to haunt you.  What if they don’t feel the same?  What if you tell them and they laugh at you or even worse, break your now fragile and extremely vulnerable heart?  So you decide to just pretend that you don’t feel that way because, well maybe you’re not really in love.  There has to be another explanation, right?  You begin to torture yourself because the more you deny the way you feel, the more you think about that person, and the more you start to analyze every little thing that happens between the tow of you.  I hate to break it to you, but (here’s that really annoying part about love) THERE IS NO EXPLANATION FOR LOVE!!!  Therefore you’re not gonna find a better explanation.

          Once you’ve reached the point where you have admitted that you are in love, you’re screwed.  Love already has you in its clutches.  There are no rules, no explanations, and there is nothing more confusing as a result of the previous two points.  But at the same time as all of this annoying, completely maddening stuff is going on (and this is extremely frustrating as well), you wouldn’t trade that feeling for the world.

          Sure you doubt yourself, but at the same time you get this rush that you can’t find anywhere else.  You know, that whole butterflies in your stomach type thing.  You can’t get anything accomplished because you only have one thing on your mind, but you have the biggest grin on your face and you can’t stop smiling.  Falling in love is definitely one of the scariest thing you can ever do because you open yourself up to another person and there is the chance that they will hurt you, but that’s where your friends come into play.  They’re always going to be there, but if you don’t take that risk, you don’t get to be driven insane by that one person (I mean that in the can’t stop smiling, butterflies kind of insane).

          Well there’s my rant for the night I guess.  I hope that all is well with you guys and I will chat with you shortly I hope.  For now, it is time for me to get some sleep as I can now see that the sun is up, but I will leave you with a quote:

"The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. 

   His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks if  

   he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and no other  inspiration."

                                                  Pearl S. Buck